So I will now go into the
original ranting’s of the Adventures in whatever it was since we now have a
back story on the plumber now known as Sir CrazyPants.
As you know from the last entry, CrazyPants shows up unannounced and thanks to the Powers-that-be, he leaves and comes back later that same day. Being that at first the story is absolutely hilarious due to the crazy-lady-in-a-towel dance that I did to praying and trying to get dressed in a hurry, I thought I would share with a friend that was not having a good day. So I start to share the story with her and she indeed does giggle at/with me (sounds strange but trust me, it was funny). So he comes in with this other guy that I don’t know and goes to the bathroom. Turns on the light, stares at the ceiling for five minutes, and neither of them say a word to each other. The smaller dude (we shall call him the SaneOne) starts to mark and cut a hole out. What I hear from my living room went something like this:
CP: What are you doing?
SO: Cutting a hole. We need a hole, right?
CP: Yeah, ok. I’ll go get the ladder and stuff.
This is where my anxiety starts kicking a bit and I quickly IM my friend (who was having a bad day). I send a silent prayer that my hubby comes back from the gym early so that I can go to work without fear of my house being completely torn apart. S.O. goes out and starts going into the attic so that he can now wire a fancy-dancy new switch to operate my new vent/light. Cool. Wait, nope, not so cool as the conversation really sends me into anxiety overdrive.
SO: Hey, I think I’m in the wrong spot. Can you see me? (I’m thinking eff no he can’t see you, you’re in the attic sir flowerbrain)
CP: Nope, you should be good, keep going.
SO: No, I’m positive I’m not in the right spot.
CP: Just keep going. I don’t even see a hole.
SO: Seriously? I just hit something that isn’t drywall. I’m in the wrong place.
CP: You're in her pantry.
SO: How? I thought you said…
CP: Well I don't know but you're still drilling her pantry. Back it up. The ceiling is falling but you're still in her pantry. Try her again.
O.M.G! There is a hole in my pantry and he wasn’t going to tell me about it. WTF? I start to believe that there just isn’t enough vino in the world to ease me out of this new set of nervousness and distress, so I IM my writer friend and tell her about it. We then agree that there is not enough vino and that we should switch houses for one day. I commented to her about the blind leading the blind in my house and how I almost had a light switch for my bathroom in the pantry and she had arachnid issues (shivers just thinking about it) and publishers being pricks (hello, read the books first before you say no, a-holes). We declared the day a wash.
At the end of the morning I had a working vent fan that of course vented into MY ATTIC. Hello to another WTF moment. Sir CrazyPants then informs me that they will be back in a few weeks to fix the vent issue. Yeah, GREAT! So when does he come back you ask? HAHAHA! He got me again, that sneaky fartknocker, two days later and not two weeks. Crap! Here we go again with the whole “he’ll be back in 10 minutes.”
So this time when I come back upstairs I quickly open up the door so that the screen door is letting in some wonderful air while I go to the bathroom to finish getting ready (hair/makeup/brushing teeth/stuff) and I hear his truck pull up. No big, knew he was coming back anyway so I expected to hear the doorbell. NOPE! Sir CrazyPants just walks right on in like he owns the joint and gets into my kitchen before he thinks about yelling out “Hello?” and so I peer out of the bathroom going “umm HeLlO?!” and our conversations goes a bit like this:
CP: Yeah, we’re going to fix that little problem with the vent.
Me: ok, well thanks.
(now he is in my personal space and I’m thinking Oh no, don’t go there) CP: Well we should be done pretty quickly.
Me: great, well I have to get ready for work so I will let you get to work now. (he is literally staring at me for a few moments and then goes to work)
CP and SO leave a ladder unattended in my driveway and the wind gets hold of it causing it to gauge in my BRAND NEW door. Awesomesauce… Yes, he is paying for it, begrudgingly, but still doing it all the same. Needless to say, he will not be doing any more work at this house thanks to the shenanigans that happened this last few times. *Choirs sing “Hallelujah”*
I leave you with happy thoughts and blessings of a better day. I do have a very nice working vent/light in my bathroom with the switch in the bathroom so BLESSED BE! :)
As you know from the last entry, CrazyPants shows up unannounced and thanks to the Powers-that-be, he leaves and comes back later that same day. Being that at first the story is absolutely hilarious due to the crazy-lady-in-a-towel dance that I did to praying and trying to get dressed in a hurry, I thought I would share with a friend that was not having a good day. So I start to share the story with her and she indeed does giggle at/with me (sounds strange but trust me, it was funny). So he comes in with this other guy that I don’t know and goes to the bathroom. Turns on the light, stares at the ceiling for five minutes, and neither of them say a word to each other. The smaller dude (we shall call him the SaneOne) starts to mark and cut a hole out. What I hear from my living room went something like this:
CP: What are you doing?
SO: Cutting a hole. We need a hole, right?
CP: Yeah, ok. I’ll go get the ladder and stuff.
This is where my anxiety starts kicking a bit and I quickly IM my friend (who was having a bad day). I send a silent prayer that my hubby comes back from the gym early so that I can go to work without fear of my house being completely torn apart. S.O. goes out and starts going into the attic so that he can now wire a fancy-dancy new switch to operate my new vent/light. Cool. Wait, nope, not so cool as the conversation really sends me into anxiety overdrive.
SO: Hey, I think I’m in the wrong spot. Can you see me? (I’m thinking eff no he can’t see you, you’re in the attic sir flowerbrain)
CP: Nope, you should be good, keep going.
SO: No, I’m positive I’m not in the right spot.
CP: Just keep going. I don’t even see a hole.
SO: Seriously? I just hit something that isn’t drywall. I’m in the wrong place.
CP: You're in her pantry.
SO: How? I thought you said…
CP: Well I don't know but you're still drilling her pantry. Back it up. The ceiling is falling but you're still in her pantry. Try her again.
O.M.G! There is a hole in my pantry and he wasn’t going to tell me about it. WTF? I start to believe that there just isn’t enough vino in the world to ease me out of this new set of nervousness and distress, so I IM my writer friend and tell her about it. We then agree that there is not enough vino and that we should switch houses for one day. I commented to her about the blind leading the blind in my house and how I almost had a light switch for my bathroom in the pantry and she had arachnid issues (shivers just thinking about it) and publishers being pricks (hello, read the books first before you say no, a-holes). We declared the day a wash.
At the end of the morning I had a working vent fan that of course vented into MY ATTIC. Hello to another WTF moment. Sir CrazyPants then informs me that they will be back in a few weeks to fix the vent issue. Yeah, GREAT! So when does he come back you ask? HAHAHA! He got me again, that sneaky fartknocker, two days later and not two weeks. Crap! Here we go again with the whole “he’ll be back in 10 minutes.”
So this time when I come back upstairs I quickly open up the door so that the screen door is letting in some wonderful air while I go to the bathroom to finish getting ready (hair/makeup/brushing teeth/stuff) and I hear his truck pull up. No big, knew he was coming back anyway so I expected to hear the doorbell. NOPE! Sir CrazyPants just walks right on in like he owns the joint and gets into my kitchen before he thinks about yelling out “Hello?” and so I peer out of the bathroom going “umm HeLlO?!” and our conversations goes a bit like this:
CP: Yeah, we’re going to fix that little problem with the vent.
Me: ok, well thanks.
(now he is in my personal space and I’m thinking Oh no, don’t go there) CP: Well we should be done pretty quickly.
Me: great, well I have to get ready for work so I will let you get to work now. (he is literally staring at me for a few moments and then goes to work)
CP and SO leave a ladder unattended in my driveway and the wind gets hold of it causing it to gauge in my BRAND NEW door. Awesomesauce… Yes, he is paying for it, begrudgingly, but still doing it all the same. Needless to say, he will not be doing any more work at this house thanks to the shenanigans that happened this last few times. *Choirs sing “Hallelujah”*
I leave you with happy thoughts and blessings of a better day. I do have a very nice working vent/light in my bathroom with the switch in the bathroom so BLESSED BE! :)
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